Kink Dictionary



Agonophilia: Understanding Sexual Arousal from Bondage and Restraints

What is Agonophilia?

Agonophilia is a fetish or sexual interest in the struggle of a partner to get free or be released from bondage or restraints. This can include ties, handcuffs, ropes, chains, or other forms of physical restraint. The arousal may come from the feeling of power or control over the restrained partner, or from the physical sensations of being restrained.

Understanding the Psychology of Agonophilia

Agonophilia can be seen as a form of BDSM, where the focus is on power dynamics and control. The person who enjoys agonophilia may enjoy the feeling of dominance and control over their partner, or the feeling of being dominated and controlled themselves. The struggle and resistance of the restrained partner can be a turn-on, as it adds to the feeling of power and control.

It’s important to note that agonophilia is a consensual fetish, and both partners should be aware of and agree to the use of restraints before engaging in any sexual activity.

Safe and Consensual Play

As with any BDSM activity, it’s important to prioritize safety and consent. Before engaging in any form of bondage or restraint play, both partners should discuss their boundaries, establish safe words, and have a plan in case of an emergency.

It’s also important to use proper restraints and equipment, such as handcuffs or ropes that won’t cause injury or discomfort. Never leave a restrained partner unattended, and be aware of any physical or emotional discomfort or distress that may arise during play.

Exploring Agonophilia with Your Partner

If you or your partner are interested in exploring agonophilia, communication is key. Discuss your fantasies and boundaries, and establish a safe word or signal that can be used to stop play if needed. Start slowly and gradually work your way up to more intense forms of restraint play.

It’s also important to check in with each other after play to ensure that both partners are feeling safe and comfortable. If at any point one partner feels uncomfortable or wants to stop, it’s important to respect their boundaries and stop play immediately.


Agonophilia is a consensual fetish that involves sexual arousal from the struggle of a partner to get free from bondage or restraints. It’s important to prioritize safety and consent when engaging in any form of BDSM activity, and to communicate openly and honestly with your partner about your desires and boundaries.

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